Portrait by Suzanne Leonard
The Life and Times of Emily
Escape from the Tibet'n Monks
I am a lhasa apso and as everyone knows we come from Tibet. You know the place way up in the himalayan mountains. Well
it is said that when Tibet'n monks die they enter into the bodies of us lhasa's. One once tried to get into me. It was way long ago...over 4 years ago.
I was rescuing climbers off of Mount Everest when suddenly I felt this spirit trying to get inside me. Well, I said no way, and started runnin lickidy split down the mountain.
As soon as I got back to Tibet I called my travel agent and took the first plane to Tallahassee, Florida. I heard there weren't any Tibet'n Monks there.
Once I got off the plane I had to find a place to crash, so I went to this lhasa homeless shelter. There were nine lhasa's crammed into this little basket. Oh well it's a night sleep.
Anyway the next day this lady came by and picked me up. She said I will take her. I said huh? Oh well she's pretty cool. She let's me sleep in their bedroom and gives me snacks all the time.
I thought I had it made now. No Tibet'n monks to deal with. Welllll not exactly. You see my master just so happens to
have a grandfather that is a Bhudist priest in Japan. I said WHAT? Well she saw I was about to bolt from that pad, so
she assured me that I will never have to go to Japan and that he, the buddist priest, will never come here.
Whew that was close.
A Brush With Death!
Yesterday I was out in the yard minding my own business when all of a sudden I felt something bite me. ANTS!!!!
Of course I rushed into the house and called 911. While I was on the phone I felt another bite, and
then another, and another. Of course my owners were oblivious to my situation. They were so unaware that
they said to me that supper was ready. Well I usually never miss a meal, (they don't call me the Miss Piggy
of Lhasa Apso's for nothing) but this time I had to. I was getting eaten alive! Finally one of my
owners noticed me jumping and running for dear life and decided they better check me out. Well I was
taking care of the situation fairly good on my own. BUT NO! They had to pick me up and start shaking
me, scratching me and all that other stupid stuff owners do. I finally had enough and bit my owner.
OOPS! Bad move. Oh well, he got the point. Well eventually they did get all those pesky ants off me.
I must have 50 welts all over my paws and belly.
To Each His Bone
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