Being an Australian Cattle Dog, I love the outdoors and while I greatly enjoyed helping Dave redecorate the inside of his house (Dave didn’t seem to share my vision at first but he later came around to my thinking), I must say that landscaping is my calling. Dave’s yard wasn’t much at first (in fact it was pretty boring) but I have a great yard now.

First of all, Phoenix is in the middle of the desert so water is pretty scarce (although you would never know it by the number of swimming pools). Most yards consist of a small section of grass surrounded by rock and drought/heat tolerant trees and plants. When Dave brought me home, his backyard landscaping consisted of a single three foot pine tree (it was a living Christmas tree that he had planted 6 months prior to my arrival) and dirt. Lots-n-lots of dirt. I loved dirt as puppy and I especially enjoyed a good romp in the mud (still do much to Dave’s dismay) so you can imagine my disappointment when Dave planted grass and laid rock in my dirt. I didn’t mind the grass so much (it felt nice and cool on my tummy) but I couldn’t stand the rock (I wanted my dirt back) and he planted trees and shrubs in all of my favorite places. As if things were not bad enough, most of the plants he had chosen were “water hogs” and not on the Phoenix Water Department’s good plant list. Drastic measures needed to be taken. Not only had he ruined my dirt, he was going to use up everyone’s water!

For the benefit of all living things, I unselfishly decided that getting my dirt back could wait until after I had removed these offensive water hungry plants. The first plant I tackled was that stupid pine tree (who ever heard of planting a pine tree in the middle of the desert?). It didn’t take long to dig it up and drag it to the side of the house and I must say that I did enjoy playing in the mud for a little while (all work and no play……). I continued my work by eating two vines (mighty tasty), ripping up numerous hedges (again stopping to play in the mud) and several flowing plants (these would have just attracted bees and bugs anyway). I had just started the task of removing the rocks from my dirt when Dave got home from work. I met him at the patio door and what can I say.....he was absolutely speechless. He just stood there admiring my work. I was all set to accept his bountiful praises when he grabbed me by the collar and dragged me into the garage (this reminds me of another incident.....maybe I’ll write about this one later) while muttering several phrases under his breath (that’s gratitude for you). He was extremely mad (guess he took my work as an insult to his “grand plan”.....the male ego is a sensitive thing) and I was banished to my room for the rest of the evening (well, at least until he couldn’t stand listening to me whine anymore).

Well, the next morning I was determined to get my dirt back (I always finish what I start) and I jumped right into the task. Do you know how hard it is to move nine tons of rock? It took Dave an entire weekend and I think that it may have taken me a couple of weeks had I not conceived a plan. My plan involved using water (under pressure of course) to move the rocks out of my dirt. This plan had the added benefit of creating mud which I could play in for the rest of the day. But where would I get the water? I had remembered seeing Dave use a big green snake to water his grass and sure enough, I found it. It had this metal thing on the end of it and quite by accident I discovered that a very powerful stream of water would come out if I turned it clockwise. I immediately set to work and was very impressed with my success.

Dave came home early that day (I think one of the neighbors called him….I guess some of the water was seeping into his yard and into the street (wasting water can carry a hefty fine in Phoenix as we found out)) and he was once again speechless. I couldn’t go out in the backyard for two days (it took awhile to dry out and what a punishment……all that mud within paws reach). Dave and I have slowly but surely redone the backyard. I now have a 15 square foot area of dirt and he has his precious rock, grass, citrus trees, and plants (all of which are on the Phoenix Water Department’s good plant list). We are even thinking about planting a vegetable garden this year.

Well, hope you enjoy the story and I hope you all have a great new year! Don’t forget to think about buying the Bad Dog video. Christmas may be over but there are always birthdays and the like! Take care -Sheena